Pluto: Go Hard or Go Away

Go Away Door Mat

Pluto squares both my Ascendant and Moon in my natal chart. It in fact forms an exact square to my Ascendant. The older I get the more I can see how Pluto squaring my Moon and Ascendant manifests in my daily life.

For one, I’ve noticed that I can be quite controversial in my views and how I present myself when I’m at 100% expression. I sometimes give too much, reveal too much. Uranus is also on my Midheaven by the way which underscores the theme of being controversial and uncompromisingly candid. I noticed that some people can take an extreme disliking towards me when I take a soul-baring approach. I have noticed that I can make the atmosphere feel too heavy, that I make some people uncomfortable. Because of this, I tend to keep to myself only allowing certain people in my circle. I am extremely guarded–Capricorn Moon rising, but I can also be very sociable and gregarious when it suits the moment. I have a lot of experience with rejection, but as an Empath I just can’t shake it off. I will allow rejection to affect me to the point where I will begin to regret expressing myself. I am a loner as a result. My North Node is in Scorpio however, so I know I cannot retreat for too long. I have a spiritual responsibility to create bonds with others in this lifetime. It’s just that sometimes I lack the proper bonding skills. I go deep before the person is ready. For me it’s either all of me or nothing.

With Pluto square Moon in particular I have noticed that as Astrologer, Sue Tompkins would say, I “emotionally crash” into situations. Either people love it or hate it. It’s the raw, unfettered emotion and the baring of my soul that causes others to become uncomfortable. Thankfully, I have a nice dose of rational energy which helps me to temper this powder keg. My discourse tends to be provocative and in your face.

As I strive for more prominence and notoriety in my field, I must remain ever so conscious of how my words, actions and demeanor affect others. I have to be able to discern whether I’m on the verge of giving too much, exposing too much, baring too much of my soul. I realize that I cannot please everyone, but I guess it’s my Libran Venus which cries out when I can’t keep the peace.

Perhaps this current Full Moon in Capricorn passing through my 1st house has prompted me to be wide open with my emotional self. This morning I found myself to be in the midst of one of those emotional crashing situations where I was very candid, maybe too candid for some. My only purpose was to provide a learning experience but it got too real. The good thing is I know when it’s time to retreat. My Moon is also square Jupiter in my 3rd house so I need to keep reminding myself to think before I take such a big leap into sensitive terrain. I tend to be an open book and what I’m learning is that some people can only take me at my preface. With Pluto’s influence on my Ascendant and Moon, I have the tendency to either go hard or just go away. There’s really no middle ground here.

To resolve this internal conflict that is the manifestation of Pluto’s influence upon my Moon and Ascendant, I plan to reserve the soul baring part of myself to a select few. I would also like to provide a spiritually-based forum for people to bare their souls without fear of judgment or persecution; where we can delve into the funkiest, darkest aspects of our astrological profiles. I believe this is one of my strengths as a professional reader.  Many people have told me that they feel as if they can tell me anything because I come across as non-judgmental and down to earth.

This Full Moon has taught me to remember that there is a proper time, place and platform for everything. It’s up to me to channel my energy accordingly.

Reference: Tompkins, Sue “Aspects in Astrology”

~ Rahbinah

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